I may not be the brightest star, but I'd like to think that I still shine in my own little way.

Bright enough to be seen at least?=/

Sigh. Comparing yourself with scholars really never leads to anything good does it? All it does is make you feel miserable. Unless of course you ARE a scholar. I don't do it all the time, but every now and then I get reminded of some bright stars of my previous schools and start to think about my own life and what I've done with it. And HELL my resume doesn't impress me. Hahaha. So then begins the digging for dirty laundry. Something to prove that these scholars aren't as perfect as they seem. Because really, you can't have it all can you? But so what if you find out that they aren't perfect? You're just doing it to make yourself feel better. You try to convince yourself that really, you're not that far behind or really, that's not the life you want anyways. Because at least, you know, I've got more time to have fun, or at least I'm better looking(don't judge), blah blah. So you don't stress out anymore, because somehow, now you're equals. And then you fall back into your old routine, the routine that really never got you anywhere. Next thing you know, Scholar dude is back on top and you're still down below trying to figure out what went wrong.

Maybe its better not to dig for dirty secrets. I prefer my idols to be perfect. Or rather, I prefer my competition to be perfect. So then at least I know there's always something I need to work towards. Because honestly, there really is a lot of work cut out for me. If I want to shine as bright as Scholar dude. LOL. Who am I kidding. Ain't gonna happen anytime soon. And really, I'm way too far behind for that.

Scholar dude is not fictional. I know someone I deem to be perfect and honestly, I'm still baffled by that possibility. How on earth can he have it all. I am so jealous. I really really am.

Oh well. Time to buck up loser. Try to make this time count please.